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7 Ways to Kickstart a Spiritual Journey

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“Don’t bend; don’t water it down; don’t try to make it logical; don’t edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly.” ~ Franz Kafka

Listen! You have from this moment until the day you die to live the life you want to live; to do exactly what it is you love, whatever that is.

But some people don’t know themselves well enough to know what they love. Sometimes a spiritual journey is needed. Sometimes a leap of courage is just what the witch-doctor ordered.

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Ask yourself: Am I okay with living a life without a spiritual journey? If the answer is yes, then by all means stop reading, bury yourself in a single, one-right-way doctrine, lean on it like a crutch, and just become religious. It’s the easier path (just remember: you can’t kickstart a dead horse).

If, however, the answer is no, then read on and imagine yourself as the creator of your own journey, and become authentically spiritual. It’s exceedingly more difficult, but definitely more rewarding. There will be giants whose shoulders you can stand on, like Jesus, Buddha and Nietzsche. There will even be crutches to lean on from time to time. Just remember, crutches have always had more utility in dust, lest we become lazy and move through life as a spiritual cripple.

Sometimes you’ll discover the voice box of God and be able to sound it like a bullhorn from your own throat chakra. Sometimes your voice will be meek and the words of others will be needed to compel you to sing. Sometimes, often, the spiritual path begins where the religious one ends.

Either way, the point of a spiritual journey is to discover yourself discovering yourself. Once you begin, it never really ends. But you have to begin in order to feel how the journey is the thing. But beginning a new journey can sometimes be daunting and scary, especially a spiritual one.

Our comfort zones can only stretch so far before we snap. So here are seven ways to marinate our comfort zones so they are more elastic and flexible for the arduous spiritual journey ahead.

1) Listen intently for the call to adventure

“What is it we are questing for? It is the fulfillment of that which is potential in each of us. Questing for it is not an ego trip; it is an adventure to bring into fulfillment your gift to the world, which is yourself. There is nothing you can do that’s more important than being fulfilled. You become a sign, you become a signal, transparent to transcendence; in this way you will find, live, become a realization of your own personal myth.” ~ Joseph Campbell

journey2 Call to adventure. Beginning initiation. Descent into soul. Transition into heroism. Call it what you will. It’s there, speaking a language that doesn’t use words. So if you want to hear it, you have to be open to hearing it. It can arrive in many ways. It can appear as unfortunate luck or unlucky fortune, or vice versa.

It can come from tripping over success or jumping over defeat. It can come from an earthquake or a thunderstorm or an entheogen. It can come from death, or birth, or both.

There’s no telling when or where it will happen, but when it happens you will know it. The universe lines up like it was designed for you. And it is!

So wherever you go, be the ears of that place. Listen with Over Ears, like as if you are a Cheshire cat perched on a cosmic tree branch listening to all things. Hone your listening skills through meditation in solitude. Sink back into the Source. Listen to silence.

2) Fearlessly embrace fear

“Stop acting so small. You are the universe in ecstatic motion.” ~ Rumi

A funny thing happens when you’re no longer afraid of fear. Your soul opens up. Your ego shrinks into a tool for your soul. Your heart overflows. And suddenly nothing can stop you, because you’re able to use your ego to leverage your soul into the world with proactive intent. You become a force to be reckoned with, the tip of the spear of the spiritual journey.

They say happiness is a choice. Well, it’s the same thing with courage. Courageous people don’t sit around waiting for courage to compel them, they choose to be courageous despite the fear which seeks to cripple them. So if you’re sincere about beginning a spiritual journey, choose courage.

Fear will roll off like water off a ducks back. And even if it doesn’t, your courage will find a way to transform it into even more courage. Proceed as if courage is inevitable and genius will arrive. As Henry Van Dyke said, “Genius is talent set on fire by courage.”

3) Read; read; read

“A mind needs books as a sword needs a whetstone, if it is to keep its edge.” ~ George R.R. Martin

head-in-a-cloud Keep your mind sharp enough to cut through any and all red tape. Spiritual journeys are not easy. They require an upheaval of the heart, a soul recalibration. One way to be prepared for the worst is to read –a lot. Sometimes it’s the wisdom discovered in a good book that launches a spiritual journey.

Reading puts the “Thoreau” in being thorough. Words compel us and liberate us. But they can just as easily silence us and imprison us. Which is why we need to read more than just one book. As Rudyard Kipling said, “Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.”

But unlike any other drug, the more words the better, because the more ideas we derive from those words, the less likely we are to hang our hats on any single idea. The more likely we are to, as Aristotle said, “entertain a thought without accepting it.”

Diversity is the key with this particular drug of choice. It has launched more spiritual journeys than any other drug known to Man.

4) Travel; travel; travel

“If the philosopher holds aloof, it’s not for reputation’s sake. The fact is that it’s his body that’s in the state, here on a visit, while his thought, disdaining all such things as worthless, takes wings.” ~ Theaetetus

Much travel is needed before the ignorant man matures into a spiritually aware being. Traveling puts life into perspective. It all at once stretches cultural comfort zones, shatters preconceived mental paradigms, and flattens conditioned boxes. The body on the move puts the mind into motion which calibrates the soul to proactively adapt and overcome to any given moment.

Seeking other states, other lives, other ways of leveraging our soul, leads to a profound understanding of impermanence and change. We see, hear, smell, taste, and feel how things are constantly in motion, how there is no such thing as a fixed state. We interdependently crush out.

This leads to a spiritual transcendence of any given state of travel, where each sojourn is merely a link in the chain of the overall journey that compels us to keep moving, to not stagnate or become too comfortable. It is the mark of a well-traveled man to entertain a place without clinging to it.

5) Use pain as a steppingstone

“You might as well be dead. Seriously, if you always put limits on what you can do, physical or anything else, it’ll spread over into the rest of your life. It’ll spread into your work, into your morality, into your entire being. There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. If it kills you, it kills you. A man must constantly exceed his level.” ~ Bruce Lee journey3

Use your wounds as a reason to heal. Pain, grief, spiritual angst, these can all be transformed into information that can guide us into a spiritual journey. Instead of wallowing in self-pity or bludgeoning ourselves with whiney, woe-is-me, tiny-ego placation; we can turn the tables on our tiny ego and use it as a tool to leverage some soulcraft into our understanding of the current existential dilemma.

What we discover on the other side of that dynamic is that our tiny-ego blossoms into a robust confidence that our soul can capitalize on by transforming boundaries into horizons, obstacles into reasons to apply newer, more imaginative strategies, and pain into steppingstones that have the potential to launch us into a heightened state of spiritual awareness. This is not to say that we should ignore the pain, or suppress it.

Not at all. In fact, in order to alchemize pain into self-actualization, one must first embrace it, honor it, and let it have its say. But after crying, after the sacred decompression, there’s no reason to wallow in tears. Better to use those tears as fuel for beginning a spiritual journey.

6) Surrender to adventure (in chunks)

“For aren’t you and I gods? Let all of life be an unfettered howl. Release life’s rapture. Everything is blooming. Everything is flying. Everything is screaming. Laughter. Running.” ~ Vladimir Nabokov

Surrender to adventure in small chunks. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Don’t get intimidated by how daunting it all is. Just remember, everything is connected, and the longer you wait between adventures, the less likely you are to gain any real spiritual traction.

You’ll just give yourself more of a reason to toss up walls of fear, or to take the blue pill instead of the red, or you’ll just browbeat yourself with inside-the-box, comfortable and secure reasoning that will keep you from ever pushing your comfort zone to see how far it can stretch before it snaps.

Better to stretch, feel the heat, maybe even get burned a little, then retract, heal the burn, and come out of the experience as a more robust individual with an even bigger comfort zone. Then repeat.

Eventually your comfort zone will be so flexible and so big that you can officially declare yourself on a spiritual journey. Practice surrendering to adventure as much as possible, and before you know it, you’ll be spending more time on adventurous seas than on comfortable shorelines

7) Cherish the moment; remember the journey is the thing

“Mysticism wonders not how the world is but that the world is.” ~ Ludwig Wittgenstein

life after deathWhether or not yours is a spiritual journey you’ve just begun or one that simply grew stale over time, it requires honest and loving engagement with the present moment. Who you are right now is fundamentally different than who you were when your journey began, or even who you were yesterday.

The journey that launched a billion journeys always begins right now with the you-of-now that is constantly changing from the you-of-yesterday into the you-of-tomorrow. As Barbara Deangelis said, “The journey between what you once were and who you are now becoming is where the dance of life really takes place.” So dance.

Remember to fall in love with the moment. Remember to be awestruck. Don’t forget to be fascinated by the magnanimous grandeur of it all. The journey is the thing, true, but it goes deeper than that –the moment is the thing too.

The here and now is the thing. The infinite present is the thing. All things that have ever, or will ever, mean anything, is contained in this instant that connects to all other instants.

So enjoy it. Revel in it. Be it. Become deep gratitude. Become loving appreciation. Being present to this moment, more than any non-present moment, has the potential to launch a spiritual journey. Indeed. You are the journey, not the destination. And it always begins right Now.

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Path into cosmos
Jester Jesus
Cloud-head traveler
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Cameron Gray

How to have a “Constructive Argument” with Your Partner

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Often in relationships, we reach a point when we feel we do not understand our partners. Not only that, but we feel that no matter how hard we try to explain our “side of the story” they’re just not getting it.

Fights, disagreements, or just tough conversations may ensue, and this makes sense, as we all try to understand, and be understood by our loved ones. But do we have a constructive argument or just fights?

I’m grateful because my partner and I know how to talk about issues in a way that helps us deal with them, instead of just flinging our emotions at each other.twin flames

I’m an intense introvert, and she’s very extroverted. I crave separation and alone time, and she likes to feel that we stay connected throughout the day. I have trouble expressing myself, and she expresses herself constantly.

So how do we figure anything out when we are coming from two drastically different sides? We talk, we listen, we compromise, and we plan our higher selves together.

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” ~ Carl Jung

Here are some questions to ask yourself or your partner when you don’t seem to be having a constructive argument.

Are we talking about the same thing?

My partner and I know that we are both aiming for the same goal, and that is to become our highest selves. This would not work if one partner is aiming for their higher self and the other is looking out only for their own needs.

In order to have a constructive argument, you need two people sharing the same value. Even if the value is to make the relationship work. Then each partner is motivated to do their part.

On another level, are we arguing about the same thing? If I’ve come to talk about my need for space, and she’s come to talk about her need for connection, then we will end up trying to convince the other of our need instead of the relationships needs.

If so, make separate times to talk about each; that way you are fully focused on each one.

Should I compromise or hold my ground?

There are things about each person that they cannot, and should not, change; and then there are the things that we all must alter and compromise in order to reach our highest self.

So whenever we have an “argument” with our partner we must first ask ourselves, “Is the thing I’m being asked to change, something that’s a part of me, or is it a blockage to my higher self?” When you question yourself it helps turn it into a constructive argument.

4ee58884dffa5f3e5e0ef0c229b3f691 I will always be an introvert. I need my alone time to recharge, think, and reconnect with myself. But, reaching out from the recesses of my alone time to let my partner know when I’ll be home is not compromising myself. It’s actually adding to my higher self, where I try to be aware of other people’s feelings and realities.

Sometimes, change and compromise is hard, and it may go against our nature. But which nature is it going against? Are you being asked to communicate more when your nature is to hold your feelings inside?

Are you being asked to listen more, when your nature is to be expressive? For each compromise, ask yourself, “Is this change bringing me closer to my true and higher self, or is it taking me away from myself?”

What am I being asked to do in reality?

Following what we said above, we must now decide something else. How can I move from conceptualization into reality? Make a plan to implement your ideas right away. Let’s say I’ve decided that I need to be more expressive with my partner.

So I plan that the next time I don’t know how to express something, I will write it down and share it with my partner. It’s easy to say you’ll do something, and another to implement a plan to get it done.

You can set a reminder on your phone to call your partner when they asked. If words are hard for you, leave notes for your partner that express your love. Be creative, and find something that will help you out in the beginning when it still feels unnatural to you.

Do I know how to be in the other’s shoes?

If you and your partner are drastically different, there will come times when you are adamantly fighting for something without hearing what your partner is trying to say. A good thing to practice is leaping into the other’s shoes.

If you find that you and your partner have fallen into specific roles: the giver and the receiver, the chaser and the runner, the mother and the child, the doer, the planner, the listener, the buyer, etc.

Whatever roles you find yourself filling, acknowledge them and switch roles for a day, or even a week. This will give you both a relief from filling your roles; making you realize that it’s okay to break the patterns, and give you the appreciation for your partner’s role as well.

ways to have a constructive argumentDo I (or my partner) have any past issues that are holding us back?

We are all made up of our life as it’s been until now, and this can sometimes get in the way of our relationships.

Whether we’ve been hurt in the past, or carry fears from our childhood; everyone comes with some baggage. It’s very important to acknowledge the issues we carry, and lay them out for ourselves and our partners to deal with in a healthy manner.

Most of the time, our reactions have more to do with our past than the current situation. So it’s important to be able to admit that what was said or done has triggered a past trauma. It’s okay to say things along the lines of, “When you walk out while we’re talking, it triggers my fears of rejection and makes me feel…etc.”.

Note: This is not meant to accommodate fears and past traumas. Past traumas cannot be used as an excuse to treat each other harshly or unfairly. Knowing each other’s past and fears gives you the ability to make each other feel safe while you work on healing those issues.

At the end of the day, disagreements are normal in every relationship, but there are constructive arguments, and less constructive ways to have these conversations with your loved one.

Each discussion, if carried out in a mature and enlightened manner, should end with a feeling of accomplishment and understanding of the other. This is what constructive arguments are all about!

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Relationships
Adam Martinakis

Authentic Existentialism: From Nihilism to Anti-nihilism

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“You have to take seriously the notion that understanding the universe is your responsibility, because the only understanding of the universe that will be useful to you is your own understanding.” ~ Terence McKenna

What does it mean to be authentically existential? In this article I attempt to answer that question by comparing and contrasting the fear-based position of nihilism, theism and the fixed state, with that of the courage-based position of anti-nihilism, existentialism and the freed state. Let’s break it down.

Nihilism, theism, and the fixed state

“Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more: it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” ~ Shakespeare

These are fear-based ontological dispositions toward meaning. The main reason most people fall into these three categories is because most would rather dodge the responsibility of self-meaning, of discovering meaning for oneself. Mainly because people are lazy, but also because discovering self-meaning is just too damn scary.

exist3If we allow ourselves to be the master of our fate, a spiritual warrior instead of a victim for example, then we have no one to blame but ourselves if things don’t turn out well.

We alone are responsible for the meaning we create, and that’s a very scary prospect for most people to handle. Let’s delve a little into each.

Nihilism

“The life of a man is of no greater importance to the universe than that of an oyster.” ~ David Hume

Nihilists are victims of fear because they fearfully reject their spirit and the expense of their humanity. They extremely renounce any meaning whatsoever. They embrace apathy and ennui while rejecting empathy and happiness because there is no meaning and everyone is nothing but an infinitesimal flash in the pan in an infinitely overwhelming and engulfing universe, so why even bother with meaning in the first place.

They are cynical and pessimistic to the extreme. They suffer from an irreverent-ego that paints the perception of reality into a lethargic, dispirited lack of concern for anything, while clinging to nothingness as if it were everything. As such, nihilism leads to spiritual stagnation.

Theism

“Time makes ancient good uncouth.” ~ James Russell Lowell

Theists are victims of fear because they fearfully reject their humanity for their spirit. They extremely defend their idea of meaning. They embrace blind faith and a self-righteous good that’s based upon parochial and outdated religious doctrines.

They suffer from a pietistic-ego that paints their perception of reality into a pigeonholed, dogmatic fundamentalism while clinging to antiquated beliefs that the passage of time has rendered uncouth.

They have placed all their eggs into a single basket, which they cling to for dear life. They vainly attempt to cram their notions of infinity into the finite paradigm of their belief at the expense of infinity (God) itself. As such, theism leads to spiritual stagnation.

Fixed States

“Life oscillates like a pendulum, back and forth between pain and boredom.” ~ Arthur Schopenhauer

What do theism and nihilism have in common? They are both based in fear, they both suffer from extremism, and they both vainly and naively attempt to cling to a fixed state. In short: they are afraid of change. They don’t want to have to answer to cause and effect, vicissitude, or impermanence.

They want things to be comfortable, to fit nicely into place, and to be securely permanent despite impermanence. They want their answers ––spoon-fed; crutch-leaned; pigeonholed–– to remain the answer, despite the Truth. As such, they lash out, they kick and they scream at anything that attempts to pull them away from their seeming need for things to remain the same.

Their tiny egos, whether pietistic or irreverent, are so afraid of the unknown that they cling to their fixed state with white knuckles and self-righteous vehemence. As such, the fixed state leads to spiritual stagnation.

Anti-nihilism, existentialism, and the freed state

“He who does not answer the questions has passed the test.” ~ Franz Kafka

exist4 This is the other side of the ontological coin. These are courage-based dispositions toward meaning. The reason most people do not fall into these three categories is because it takes courage, passionate and empathic self-love/Agape-love, fearless forgiveness, and high humor.

It takes spiritual grit and trial-&-error resolve to become personally responsible for creating self-meaning. One must be okay with being wrong, with being fallible, and with being an imperfect human being.

But in the next instant one must also at least attempt to do better, to become healthier, and to strive toward wisdom and enlightenment. Even if, and maybe even especially if, it’s all for naught. Let’s delve a little into each.

Anti-nihilism

“The Church says: the body is a sin. Science says: the body is a machine. Advertising says: The body is a business. The Body says: I am a fiesta.” ~ Eduardo Galeano

Anti-nihilists are courageous because they dare to turn the tables on nihilism. They embrace nihilism. But rather than dwell on it, rather than drown in the glass-is-half-empty ennui of it all, they decide to swim, and they keep swimming.

But they’re looking for waves, and before you know it they’re surfing. They courageously catch the Giant Wave of Meaninglessness and thereon declare meaning within their surfing. So what it’s all meaningless? So what it’s all an illusion?

So what it’s all a giant void of nothingness with us suffering at the center of a giant cosmic joke? It’s our meaninglessness within which to create my own meaning. It’s our illusion to play with. We are the ones laughing at the cosmic joke instead of merely being the butt-end of it. As such, the anti-nihilist becomes the spiritual personification of freedom.

Existentialism

“There can be no transformation in the world outside unless there is transformation from within. It is our responsibility to bring about a radical transformation within ourselves.” ~ Krishnamurti

Existentialists are courageous because they directly and proactively engage in creating meaning for themselves despite the inherent meaninglessness of the universe and in spite of the overall absurdity of existence.

They understand that absurdity doesn’t lie in an ontological condition, but in an existential contradiction: it is the primary paradox of human conception.

How to find meaning in a meaningless universe. How to find meaning when “meaning” only means something according to the creator of the meaning: us. So the existentialist is aware of being a pivot for meaning itself.

They embrace the fact that they alone must leverage meaning into their own lives, and then be responsible with the consequences of such leveraging. As such, existentialists become the spiritual personification of freedom.

The Freed State

“What labels me, negates me.” ~ Søren Kierkegaard

exist5 At the end of the day, even anti-nihilism and existentialism are merely labels. The freed state is authentic existentialism. The freed state sheds all labels, even as it occasionally dons them.

A person who has achieved a free state of existence comes and goes as she pleases. She dips in and dips out. She swims freely through all labels, titles, names, brands, prejudices, beliefs, thoughts, and dispositions.

She dons a mask, then she breaks it, and then she dons another. She slips into the cloak of nihilism and then slips out into the cloak of anti-nihilism, enjoying the sport of it.

She slides into the skin of theism, mocking it with high courage, and then slides into the skin of existentialism, laughing at it with high humor.

She stumbles in and glides out. She falls into rabbit holes and ascends into wormholes. She transforms Witchcraft into wit-craft. Why? Because she can! Because she is the Infinite Player, and it’s all a game that only she is responsible for.

It’s her sacred game to play, and nobody can stop her. It’s all her meaning to personify through expressive art and compassionate love. She existentially cries out, as Fernando Pessoa once said: “I am nothing. I’ll never be anything. I couldn’t want to be something. Apart from that, I have in me all the dreams in the world.”

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Miles Toland

Five Ways to Heal a Painful Past

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” ~ Wayne Dyer

Sometimes certain things never fall in place, it just stays the way it is! We all face or are experiencing circumstances in life where one wishes things were different. But sometimes, it is what it is, and the only thing that can change or we have control over is our perspective about it.

I was recently pondering over the circumstances in my own life, which pulls me into a stormy or never-ending tunnel of darkness and I find myself trapped in my own web of thoughts…pause, take a deep breath!

When the mind gets caught up in thoughts like these, then the only way to resurface would be to change the way you look at things. Instead of getting pulled into your own storm, ride with the storm, surf through it and shout, ‘Hurray, I’ve managed to do it’ or ‘I can do this’.

The mind is such a tricky little thing, if you feed it with negative thoughts, it will keep consuming them until it explodes.

On the other hand, if you feed it with positive thoughts and intentions, it ponders. It’s reluctant to change its old ways and patterns, so it chews on the new thoughts and swallows them.

Staying strong during these times is the key; rewiring oneself isn’t the easiest thing to do.

This quote really struck a cord because we still have control over our thoughts, we simply need to change the flow. How can we go about doing this?

Here are five ways to heal a painful past –

1) Accept Your Past

“Happiness can exist only in acceptance.” ~ George Orwell

acceptance and embrace change

It took me a long time to accept the death of my father and the subsequent depressive state of my mother when I was a teenager. I use to refrain from talking about it to my friends, some didn’t even know about it, until much later on.

One of the main reason was that whenever I spoke about it, I would end up crying and this also led to bottling up of feelings.

The key here is acceptance of any situation, no matter how heart-rending or painfully agonizing it is. Once you accept it, you aren’t in a state of denial and not simply suppressing your emotions and feelings.

Embrace it, give it some love, nurture thoughts that will help your emotional growth, for the simple reason: shit happens.

2) Spend time alone

“There are times when alone is the best place to be.” ~ Unknown

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Don’t run away from yourself or distract yourself by going out with friends or indulging in different sensory pleasures. This might seem to help in that moment, but its not a permanent fix.

You are simply chasing your thoughts or procrastinating from facing the challenges/difficult times head on. There are many who fear facing themselves, how can you fear your own self or fear your own thoughts?

Fear is the cause of a lot of pain, anger, and frustration. Of course, it’s not easy. I have realized that challenges make you stronger– a process that unfolds slowly and gradually. Let it unfold!

Hold your fears by the neck, twist it, bend it, thrash it or do whatever it takes to end its power over you. Spending time alone will give you the space to get a better grip on the situation. Declutter your mind and I’ve always said, a heavy dose of nature works wonders.

3) Self-healing rituals

“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.” ~ Joseph Campbell

Rituals needn’t be religious in nature; it is that sacred time you devote solely to yourself in a sacred space (if you like to call that).

Burning sacred herbs, tratak meditation (gazing at a small object or candle flame), mindful living, meditation, yoga, chanting, gardening, earthing, and so on can help you to heal those suppressed emotions. It will keep you calmer and gain better mental clarity on the current situation.

I find practising yoga, gardening, nature walks and grounding extremely nourishing and beneficial for my soul; although I still have my bad days. What the heck, we aren’t perfect! 🙂

4) Heart-to-heart conversations

“We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection.” ~ Brené Brown

Having a heart-to-heart talk with anyone you resonate with at a deeper level – be it your loved one, friend, therapist – can put you back on track. Problems arise when you are unable to express your true feelings freely; speak your heart and mind with people (close to you or the ones you are comfortable with).

Cry your eyes out if you wish – crying also is a form of cleansing and relieves you from pain. I cherish honest conversations with people I am comfortable with, what’s the point of shallow talks?

The real essence of communication or connecting with another person lies in the ability to open up and bare your soul, and you realise that it isn’t so bad after all. It can help you change your perception during troubled times; if only you are able to talk about it in the first place.

5) Believe in yourself

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Most importantly, all of the above would be of no use, if you don’t believe in yourself. If I didn’t believe in myself that I would be able to overcome my father’s death or my mother’s state of mind, I would have been a hopeless victim of my circumstances. Believe that there is nothing so difficult to get your grip around. Love yourself first and be honest to your own feelings.

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” ~
Stephen R. Covey.

Wouldn’t it be a better place if all spoke with the intention to listen? We all have stories to share, stories that has made us who we are today, what’s your story?

Here are ways to break negative thought patterns, and heal a painful past

Reprogram Your Mind, Break Negative Thinking Patterns

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5 Positive Affirmations to Turn Your World Around

“You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees light and rainbows when they look at you, but if you yourself don’t know it, all of that doesn’t even matter.” ~ C. JoyBell C.

I was not aware of the power of positive affirmations. It was just a vague concept in my mind until I read a very special article that made me start implementing this vital tool in my life. The writer talked about how his mother would whisper positive affirmations to him before bed, and how as an adult, he had to learn to whisper them to himself and keep the positivity that she had introduced to him.

Now, not everyone has a parent who does this for them as a child, so as an adult, it’s even more crucial to surround ourselves with positive messages. What I learned from reading this article was so important to my journey and my healing process. I knew the messages that I needed to hear to be my healthiest self.

I was aware enough to know what negative beliefs were holding me back, and which healthy messages would counteract them, but I forgot that it wasn’t enough to just have this knowledge in my mind; I had to implement it. I had been waiting for these messages to magically come my way, as if my loved ones should automatically sense what I needed as soon as I knew it.

I couldn’t control the messages being given to me by the people in my life, but I could control the messages I gave to myself, and this made a world of difference. After finishing the article, I sat down with a pen and paper to follow the practice that he had suggested.

5 Positive Affirmations to Turn Your World Around

I was going to write five affirmations on a paper and hang it next to my bed where I could see it every morning, and every night before I went to sleep. I looked into myself and saw the negative messages that I had been telling myself, or hearing from others, and I wrote a positive affirmation to counter each one. This is what I ended up writing:
1) I am capable.
2) I am supported by loved ones.
3) I can be productive and inspired.
4) I am safe.
5) The world is a beautiful place.

Some people may feel an emotional connection to these if they are dealing with negative beliefs that are similar to those I had been dealing with. Each one held such weight for me because they were things that I was struggling to believe, but were being blocked by the negative messages that were saying the exact opposite.

power of positive affirmations

And so, I put these powerful words up by my bed. And each day, I would look at this paper and say these things to myself. I’m not sure exactly when my beliefs switched over, but through a gradual yet completely self-changing process, they did. And now looking at these affirmations, I know that I believe each one fully and without a trace of doubt.

I am capable. I am supported by loved ones. I am able to be productive and inspired. I am safe. And, the world is a beautiful place. These are my truths now, through thick and thin, they are a part of my inner belief system.

That’s my experience with positive affirmations. And it’s had more of an impact than I can even begin to grasp. Because once these beliefs became a part of me, I started acting with these beliefs. I began more projects and volunteered for more jobs because I believed that I was capable of doing them.

I could venture out and take chances because I knew that I was supported, and not alone as I believed before. I wasn’t tentative with my creativity because I knew I had the ability to be both inspired and productive at the same time. I was able to embrace being happy because my inner beliefs told me that the world was actually a beautiful and wonderful place, and not a world working against me.

Every person can benefit from switching over their negative beliefs to positive. If you are reading this, take a piece of paper, and write down five positive affirmations, and put it somewhere that you will remain aware of it. You will thank yourself when you realize how much positivity was allowed into your life because of it.

I am

If you don’t know where to start, here are a few suggestions to get you started. If you feel emotionally connected, or if you feel a pang of sadness that you’ve never gotten this message, then write it down along with any others you can think of.

I am loved.
I love and accept myself.
I am beautiful.
I am seen for who I am.
I am strong.
I am able to change my life for the better.
I have infinite wisdom inside me.
I am able to be happy and fulfilled.
I am capable of anything I put my mind to.
I am smart.
I am good.
I have a positive influence on those around me.

I hope that these affirmations can get you started, or give you an idea of what you want to write. If you connect to any of these, please use them on your paper, but try to also add some of your own, because the ones that come from yourself will truly be the antithesis of your inner negative beliefs and will therefore have the most effect on your life. Remember that this is a tool: a means to an end, and that end is loving yourself for exactly who you are.

“Every time you speak, you are either building up yourself for the better or you are limiting yourself for the worse. Words carry power, therefore before you speak out, speak in… and test your words!”
~ Israelmore Ayivor, Daily Drive 365

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Positivity